himynameisminnie

What food is your weakness?

Peanut butter for sure, and pretty much any sort of icecream. I also love coffee, especially fancy starbucks drinks. tim horton’s double-double’s are to die for… and eating out anywhere. my boyfriend takes me out no less than three times a week when we’re together, and i can’t help but order the most delicious things on the menu and drink fancy cocktails. plus we always get dessert :) 

…wait, did this question only call for one food weakness?? hahaha…

Do you have an eating disorder?

I would say I do, even though I don’t feel like i do. know what i mean? i restrict, i don’t eat when i want to, i work out obsessively… but at the same time i feel really healthy, and i feel good about myself when i’m at the gym or eating a delicious meal that’s only 200 calories or less. and at the end of the day, if i’ve clocked in 2 hours at the gym, and eaten less than 1000 calories, i feel like i can do anything. i weigh less than 94% of north americans… who can say that? plus i know that one day soon i’m going to look great, and i’ll feel great about myself (not to say that i don’t feel somewhat great about myself already…).

When did you first decide to lose weight?

I suppose this all started after I finished my first year of university and had lost my girlish figure. my body was starting to change (finally) and my boobs got bigger, my hips “wider” and my stomach lost its muscle definition. i’d always been super skinny and fit without really trying, so this hit me really hard. i started going to the gym a couple times a week and i played intramural basketball and volleyball, but i wasn’t getting any smaller. after third year i amped things up. that summer i spent every day at the gym for at least an hour, i fasted regularly, and i even tried to purge (no luck cause i hate puking). i saw a few changes over the course of the summer, but nothing major. then when i met my current boyfriend, everything went out the window. we ate out almost every day, and the only exercise i got was in bed (not that that’s bad….). after he flew back to europe, i went to india for three months where i gorged myself on the most delicious indian food of my life (no shit, eh?). i didn’t gain any weight because all the food there was super super healthy, and the heat helped keep the fat away, but my hips also widened during that time by another inch. coming home and being a size 27 in my pants, when i’d been a 24, 25 tops my entire life was a definite eye opener. however, i had no time to start dieting because my boyfriend came to visit for a month in february, i was in a full-time practicum for my teaching degree in march, and then i went to europe to visit him for april. therefore i started going hard at this in may, and i haven’t looked back! 

the last three days have been hard to get through. i ate too much last night at the baseball game i went to (3 beers, plus a hamburger and hot dog… enough said), and school is really getting me down. the people around me are really getting me down. my boyfriend and i had a fight on skype for 2 hours, and that especially got me down. i woke up this morning feeling like shit. you know how it is…

but then… i walked to tim horton’s this morning to grab a coffee (first time i’ve done that since i got here 4 weeks ago!) which instantly picked me up. class was fun and went by fast, and i had some really great conversations with the two girls i hang out with at school here. then i went to the gym and pushed myself through two cardio sessions! which is something i rarely ever do, and even my weight training went really well and felt great. then my mum called me for the first time in almost two weeks, and we had a surprisingly good conversation. my family and i generally don’t get along, so it is always so nice when we do. she’s being really supportive of all the school and friend bullshit i’m going through right now here, and she’s happy that i’m getting away to montreal this weekend. annnnddd, she told me to check my mailbox here and there was an early birthday letter from her and my dad! a gift card to starbucks and tim horton’s! hahaha, i’m such a sucker for coffee!! they’re going to take me out when i get back to BC, but this was something to tide me over since we won’t be together to celebrate my birthday on monday. i know i said we normally don’t get along, but life is often surprising :)

anyways, i feel like i’m back in the game, and i’m feeling better. my body is going to start showing the consequences of my negative eating yesterday and i’m dreading that, but i’m also trying to be preventative by working out hard and staying motivated. i hope all of you are being successful too! if i’ve learnt anything, it’s that things do get better!

Are you vegetarian or vegan? If so, has this helped you lose?

I am definitely not either of those. I love meat way, way, way too much. I would consider going veg for environmental reasons, but until i learn how to cook a decent meal, i’m going to stick with being a carnivore :)